Empty Sac

suddenly the doctor   is leaving the room   telling us
take all the time   you need                i’ve always felt
restless   claustrophobic   in those rooms      time becoming
windowless                                         now i wait

for body   to recognize              absence          hard to say
what body knows   or doesn’t       hard to translate
a subsiding soreness    those fleeting twinges    the traces
of brown blood   that could have been   warnings       i want to believe

there is  wisdom   in    body’s   holding on            bracing me
by building   layers of  protective tissue     soft husk
sinking in    before        its uprooting

                                                            i want to know
how it ends    if we can    if we will      i think
of all those years    we could have   might have      didn’t
try   didn’t know    what i wanted
                                                            erased